Listening to our Emotions

(Lesson 3 with the Vernon Community School, SD22) Let’s try to make sense today of what it would mean to experience our emotions in a different way. Rather than fearing them and shutting them down – actually noticing the sensations of our emotions, and considering the messages within the emotions. How do we learn to hear the message of the emotion? Well, emotions are often felt in the body – there is some sensation stirred up. Because of that, it seemed fitting to start our group today by thinking about a recent situation (unique to each student) that triggered some emotion. Once each student had an example in mind, I asked them to notice what sensations stirred up in their bodies. The students noticed that there was a lot of muscle tension that accompanied their emotions: tightness in their chest, throat, and stomach. Some students giggled and noticed a lot of nervous energy in their bodies. The key is to notice the emotion in your body: just observing the sensations the emotion evokes in your body, and less of those verbal descriptions. Become a curious observer – notice and track the sensations, and how they change (intensifying or lessening). Ultimately, if we learn to notice our emotions and how they impact us, we can tap into the message of the emotion and perhaps even the energy of that emotion – and that emotion will then despite. But what if it doesn’t? Sometimes our emotions do run awry. What if fear bubbles up in a person and when she tunes in, she notices the energy of her fear response but there is no message? We need to change the way we understand these emotions in our bodies, and have an understanding of how our brain processes emotion. For a great description of how the brain processes emotion, check out the Integrated Wellness blog. Fear rises up from our reptilian brain (I know, why the heck does it have to be called the ‘reptilian’ brain?? Well, its because 3 important parts of the human brain emerged successively in the course of evolution. These include the brain stem, the limbic system, and the neocortex). The term ‘reptilian brain’ refers to the brain stem and the cerebellum. These parts of the brain control vital body functions such as heart rate, temperature, and breathing. It is the center for our survival and instinctual behaviours – they are reliable but often rigid and compulsive (and thus resistant to change!). Back to the example of fear flaring up. These situations can trigger panic responses in our bodies. If we fear the panic response in the body, we grow to fear emotions that lead to fear and panic, which can lead to avoidance behaviour. Unfortunately, if we don’t want to have an emotion, try as we might not to have it, we still will – just in covert ways. (For example – not wanting to feel the energy of ‘anxiety’ but then noticing this energy has converted into an argumentative communication style in relationships). So instead of being so quick to shut down those emotions – let’s try working through them over the next few weeks.

  1. Notice the emotion instead of quickly shutting it down, bracing or defending against it.
  2. Notice how that emotion manifests in your body (use that ‘curious observer’ to notice what sensations are there in your body – what muscles tighten? How does your breathing change? How does your posture or body movements change?)
  3. If the sensations you notice with the emotion are over-whelming – use one of the techniques we discussed for grounding:
  • usearrow your imagination and visualize the uncomfortable sensations as a colour – allow the colour to move through your body and out through your feet
  • take a moment to write/draw/scribble in your journal as a way to process the emotion
  • imagination technique of protection

These 3 points are all designed to just get you grounded, so that you don’t feel so overwhelmed by the emotions. Once grounded and back in your thinking brain, it becomes a little easier to decide what course of action you would like to take (responding to the emotion).   To learn more, check out Karla McLaren’s blog. She talks a great deal about being with our emotions, and breaking cycles of fearing our emotions.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s